Deciphering Spears’ Truth

“I feel like I’m at Harvard,” said Britney Spears to OK magazine referring to the process of writing Letter of Truth: I Hope You Can Handle It.

Letter of Truth was penned by the singer and the main point is that finally Mrs. Spears will be taking a much-needed break. The woman whose phenomenal career brought us Christina Aguilera, Jessica Simpson and Mandy Moore is reluctantly stepping away from the scrutiny of being a public figure — for a short while, that is.

The self-proclaimed Ivy-league songstress manages to use the exclamation point a staggering eight times and uses capitalization to GET HER POINT ACROSS. Besides illustrating a command of the English language and a keen knowledge of grammar, Brit’s letter basically proclaims the blonde-bombshell is taking control of her career and opting to enjoy married life.

The past 12 months for the “Toxic” singer have seen her beaten with one harsh headline after another, covering her 55-hour marriage and the recent swap of nuptials with Kevin Federline. At her current rate, Spears might just beat Jennifer Lopez for worst celebrity at marriage.

US Weekly published their overexposed blondes list and topping it was the troubled pop-tart. Alongside the singer was Cameron Diaz, who just happens to be dating Justin Timberlake, and Jessica Simpson, who beat Spears for the role of Daisy Duke in the upcoming The Dukes of Hazard flick. Spears, again gracing us with her would-be Harvard writing, addressed the magazine in her letter.

“My prerogative right now is to just chill and let all of the other overexposed blondes on the cover of US Weekly be your entertainment … GOOD LUCK GIRLS!!!”

But one has to think, why release a letter such as this on the eve of her greatest hits CD’s release and “cleverly” mention her new single within the letter? That single of course is “My Prerogative,” a Bobby Brown cover that Spears is targeting at a rather judgmental press.

Spears has always been successful at creating buzz that intern results in tremendous record sales. So why stop now? Is the letter simply just a media gimmick? No, but she has gone to great lengths to ensure that this “temporary retirement” gets as much press as possible. This letter is sure to drive many hormonal teenage girls to the local Wal-Mart on Nov. 9th to grab a copy of Greatest Hits: My Prerogative and surely continue Spears perfect track record of scoring no. 1 albums. And if that wasn’t enough, her 2005 calendar and her perfume, Curious are available now as well.

In fact, Spears claimed she was going to take a break in 2002, but instead released her fourth record In The Zone. So if Spears is following the same game plan, expect a new album, a tour and a slew of other merchandise coming sometime next year.

Should Spears unwisely continue her extremely bizarre behavior, she may join fellow divas Mariah Carey and Whitney Houston in obscurity, leaving Aguilera to rule the millions of pop drones.

Sitting back and watching the rollercoaster ride that is Spears’ life, you can’t help but ask who is Britney Spears. One minute she’s a wholesome and virginal pop star, then she’s a woman who’s already been married twice and is on the verge of career suicide. Hopefully, when Spears returns from this break she will have figured that out and invested slightly more effort in creating some decent music. I guess one can only hope.

Contact Entertainment EditorPablo Saldana at