(April 17/ Tampa Bay Performing Arts Center/ $45.25-$75.25)
Who the hell is this guy? This guy is one of those enigmatic cases that’s a top-selling artists, but no one you’ll ever meet owns this guy’s album; like Creed or Yanni. Groban is just a pseudo-crooning pansy that alludes to really loving Jesus, but grows his hair long and curly to make sure he nabs fans from both sides of the musical pendulum. Basically, he deserves a good alley beating.
N.A.B.F. Heavyweight Title Bout
(April 17/ Hard Rock Casino/ $30-$250)
Call me crazy, but maybe boxing’s popularity is dwindling because it costs almost $300 to get through the gates. DaVarryl Williamson takes on Elicier Castillo for the title of a fight federation akin to the NFL Europe of boxing. I’ll take Who Cares for a second round TKO. Unless Mike Tyson’s in the ring with a lion and a bear, I’ll pocket all but $25 of the cash, which I’d give to some drunk frat boy to urinate on a Dale Earnhardt cap in the middle of a country/western night club. Now that’s entertainment.
(April 20 – May 2/ Tampa Bay Performing Arts Center/ $42 – $80)
This is what I hate about Broadway. It spawns some yawner, under the guise of light-hearted comedy and sing-songing, which becomes an enormous hit. People then flock to see it because it’s garnered the intangible brand of “acclaim” (those darn journalistic critics). And to keep the play/musical steaming right along, the show nabs the “Broadway” label and travels around the country, hosing folks for their jack while rotating annoyingly uncreative celebs (eh-um, Nathan Lane and Matthew Broderick) into the lead roles. So ladies, do not drag us guys out to see this garbage; there’s a game on, for Chrissakes.