With Valentine’s Day only eight days away, many single people may be scrambling to find a last-minute date. For some, that may be a simple task, while others may have no idea how to put away the anxiety and awkwardness to land a date.
Just over a week may not be enough time to procure someone new, but some people already have a special someone that occupies his or her thoughts through the
day, and may just lack the confidence to go after the one they want.
Here is a list of tips to help those escape the awkward-zone and land a date with someone special on the international day of romance.
Have confidence…if even for only 20 seconds
There is nothing sexier in a potential mate than someone that exudes confidence. There is a line from the
movie “We Bought a Zoo” that can be applied in any situation, including asking someone out: “Sometimes all you need is 20 seconds of insane courage.”
Just try not to cross the line into arrogance. Have the confidence to approach and spark up conversation, but make sure the conversation stays on the one you are interested in.
Don’t use a pick up line
Though having confidence is a huge turn-on for most, getting to the point you feel all you need is a corny pick-up line is a huge turn-off. Saying things like, “Are you sure your name isn’t Google, because you have everything I am searching for” and “Hey, I lost my number, can I borrow yours?” will only get you an eye roll and the silent treatment. Use your confidence to find a quality about the person you are interested in and compliment her or him on that. Just make sure the qualities do not fall in a creepy zone. Stick with laugh, smile and eyes — try to stay above the neck.
Watch where your eyes wander
Make sure when you are having a conversation with a potential mate that you maintain eye contact. Do not look at your shoes, the person’s “assets” or other people. Looking into someone’s eyes shows you are engaged in the conversation and do not have ulterior motives. But be careful, because sometimes too much eye contact or the way you are staring at the person could come off a little intense and homicidal. Just simple, soft, eye contact is all you need.
Don’t rely on Grindr or Tinder
The goal is to try to plan for a nice night out, filled with romance and conversation. Sure those elements could possibly lead to more intimate ending to the night, if both parties agree, but to go into knowing that all you want is a casual hookup takes all the magic out of the holiday.
It is equivalent to telling a 5-year-old there is no such thing as Santa. Even though that may be all that you’re looking for at the moment, do what millions of parents do at Christmas — pretend. But if you do go the pretend route, do not make any promises. Treat your date as if he or she is the only one in the room and give him or her the respect that everyone one else is getting on their date. Of course, if the day comes and you still don’t have anyone to spend the day of love with, pull out your phone, click on the app and have fun.
This one goes out to all of the ladies
Don’t wait for him to ask you out. If you are interested in a guy and you know if he is single, refer to the confidence tip and go for it. Though you may be nervous, there are so many reasons why this will more than likely work in your favor. To start with the obvious, if the person you are interested in is shy, they may be so shy that they do not know how to approach you. Some of the most romantic men are the shy ones. Sometimes even if they may have the appearance of confidence, he may still be too shy to make the first move.
Another reason is this is 2014. Enjoy the age of gender equality and go after what you want. If they say no, it really is not the end of the world. You’re only experiencing what millions of people have experienced before you.
Swim in the pool of your friends
If you are not interested in finding love or if you are looking for a love that will last forever, this may be the most important and beneficial tip of the whole list. In your group of friends you will find someone you like hanging out with, can have a steady conversation with and already know his or her likes and dislikes.
If you are not looking for a relationship, find a friend in the same situation and the two of you going out on the Feb. 14 will be no different than spending time with him or her on any other night. If you are looking for love, friendship is the strongest foundation of true love. You may find something there that you never knew existed.